Hello everyone, and welcome to a special bonus podcast! Last month, I interviewed life coach, author, blogger, and podcaster Matt Pappas about trauma and anxiety. This time, it was my turn to be interviewed!
By appearing on Matt’s podcast, I had the opportunity to introduce his audience to the concept of IFS. During our conversation, I encouraged Matt to apply the IFS lens to his own experience. Do you need a refresher course on the ins and outs of IFS? Then this podcast is for you!
“Who else could I be?”
Matt and I began our conversation by discussing parts: what they are, and how to recognize them. For me, I first became aware of parts when I noticed that I have a very active planning part. Anytime I let my mind “go,” it defaulted to planning mode. “What would it be like for me, if this part of me took a break? Who else could I be?”
All of our parts are there for a reason — even the ones we might not be so proud of. By going inside and becoming more aware of them, we start to understand why they’re there. Maybe, for example, you have a fear of trying new things. When you go inside and get to know this scared part of you, you might remember a time in your life when you tried something, failed at it, and were shamed or mocked. Now you can say, “Of course I have a part that’s afraid to try. Something happened a long time ago and taught me that it can be dangerous.”
Self: the Final Frontier
Speaking with Matt, I described the IFS lens as a journey of Self discovery. While we may have mapped out all the lands on earth, our own Self is the final frontier. “We can go inside and start to wear this lens, and discover who we are on the inside.”
A big part of personal development through IFS is the process of cultivating Self Qualities. Remember, these are the 8 qualities of Self:
- Calm
- Compassion
- Curiosity
- Courage
- Creativity
- Connection
- Confidence
- Clarity
You recognize these qualities because you’ve experienced them before. You always have an abundance of these qualities, but you might not feel them because a part of you is blocking them!
Using IFS In Your Life
Matt and I also discussed how to use IFS tools in our everyday lives. We touched on the importance of practicing techniques like Self compassion and unblending. If you practice these things when you’re not in a place of overwhelm or anxiety, you’ll find it much easier to use them when you need them.
We covered so much more, and I hope you’ll listen along. I loved the opportunity to join Matt on his podcast and explore the IFS process with him. Matt, thank you so much for having me on the show!
Image Credit
“Street Life” by Flickr user (M), licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.